My Obsession With Looking Younger.

Photo by Larissa Merriman

No one would ever call me beautiful — but when I was younger, my complexion was enviable. The kind of skin that poets, musicians, and makeup artists refer to as “porcelain.” I was (and still am) filled with a lot of self-loathing about my hair, my looks and especially my weight, but not about my skin (at least on my face.) It was great.